[jjiiioooooo]

My suffering of tmau cause me a unexpected virginity because woman cannot do date me of my condition. My question is that are there virgins in this forum because im 27 and not getting laid.

[blue_sky_collector]

Oh jjiiioooooo, they are many 27 year old virgins who don't smell, trust me on that one!
(meant to be a joke)

[mpdela]

Hi jjiiioooooo,

I understand where you're coming from. Even if a sufferer decreases his/her odor substantially, there is still the intimacy issues that remain. By nature, in intimacy, two people have to be in the closest proximity and all scents are perceived. However, do keep in mind that not everyone can smell a sufferer unless the odor is extreme. We have many people in relationships and married in this community, and their partners claim that they don't smell them, though other people do.

I guess the only thing left to do is to prepare ourselves emotionally for rejection and then be pleasantly surprised when we run across someone we like who doesn't reject us for our odor. How do we prepare ourselves for rejection? By analyzing the cause of our rejection...Is our body language so defensive that we push people away? Are we so wrapped up in having odor that we cease to develop our personality? Did we really open up and be ourselves openly to this person?

If we determine that the cause of the rejection was not our personality or behavior, then we could safely assume that it was the odor, and then we need to disregard and move on without internalizing the rejection because it was not directed at us, but rather just our odor. We can then move on to try to find someone who does not smell the odor, and work on a relationship with that person. It works and it happens frequently amongst sufferers.

Good luck to you.

María

[Vradiqa]

Hey jjiiioooooo,

A fellow smelly friend who just lurks here, met a girl I forgot where, either in this 3d chatroom called Imeem or one of his MMORPG games. After being so reluctant to bring their encounter offline, he finally took that risk and now the girl says she wants to bring him out more often rather than him isolating himself.

Their relationship is another example that it is possible for romance and kindness to reach into the stinky aura of someone like us and touch the heart deep.

As for myself, yeah I have no luck either, day in and out all I'm getting is being made fun of. But I believe love exists, although it's not gonna ever belong to me.

[rohit]

maria you said it right.
In my case i really try to not to be open and i am afraid to speak to people.
I always get a feeling whenever i go to meet people that the people hate me and really don't want me to be at that place.
Even in the two meetings with our group members i felt uncomfortable even though i knew that these people are also suffering from the same disorder.
It's not about only odor any more for me now i have really became a person who will always be socially awkward.It has changed my personality.

[manny_calavera]

Just wait till you get to paradise, man. Heaps of virgins there!

[mpdela]

Rohit,

I understand exactly what you mean, the odor leads to other mental states that feel like an impenetrable wall. Overwhelming and overpowering at times.

I always believe that we can only take one step at a time, one event at a time. Change in ourselves can only come when we decide that we are going to let our good judgement guide us, as opposed to our desire to hide. You can't speed through this process of inner growth, you need to keep it real.

My suggestion is for you to do the mental exercise of at least once a day to look around you with the mental focus of trying to see who YOU like as opposed to who likes you. Being honest and true to yourself, don't take action to socialize right away unless it feels right. But do the mental exercise to broaden your mind, to change your perspective a little at a time, day by day. Things will begin to fall into place. Try to visualize youself flashing a kind smile to someone you like that you may consider a nice person. You know, doing something simple like that, as opposed to some 'grand' act. Little by little, slowly but surely.

You know, you always have us to express yourself with.

María

[jcc34]

Yes, i've definitely found the psychological aspect to be difficult to get past. The holistic doctor I've worked with suggested using EFT (emotional freedom technique) to deal with this side of things. All that leaves is to address the underlying physical causes and you're in the clear!